I try to be open-minded when it comes to my online/offline interactions with people affected by diabetes. On one hand, I can be as snarky and self-centered as anyone. On the other hand, I have learned that being kind and supportive gets easier with practice and soon becomes a very nice way to lead one’s life. I have definitely had good role models in the DOC and I thank you all. I am also old enough that I have learned that there is no right answer to every question and no guarantee that doing the “right” thing will guarantee good results. So I try to be understanding of other people and usually I succeed.

Last weekend I unwittingly became the the central character in an unpleasant diabetes online experience. Neither the group nor subject is important. I have pretty thick skin and was more stunned than hurt by the barrage of comments. I suppose one problem with the Internet is that although you can control what you write, you can’t always control how your words and intent are received. I don’t pretend to be perfect and am willing to accept responsibility for my missteps although I still don’t quite understand what happened.

I’ve spent a fair amount of time this week thinking about my responsibilities as a member of the DOC. I had a recollection that some blogger once outlined behavior suggestions for the diabetes community. The few longtime DOC bloggers whom I asked about this didn’t think that such a thing existed. Chances are that I once read an article about general online etiquette and that stuck in my mind.

Whenever you have interpersonal problems, I think that the best thing you can do is take a deep breath and reread Robert Fulghum’s list of things to be learned in kindergarten. It always makes me smile.

Now that we’re feeling all warm and cozy, let’s consider the DOC and whether there should be a code of conduct. The bloggers whom I recently contacted and the DSMA Tweet Chat of 9/3/14 were unanimous in the opinion that there should be no rules for the diabetes online community. According to one writer, rules would go against the “organic flow” of the community. I think that means that we’re an opinionated and rowdy bunch who have a modicum of common sense along with compassion and mutual respect. But when all is said and done, a few rules did come out of the discussion.

Here you go, DOC Friends!  (with special thanks to K-bloggers Kerri, Kelly, and Kim)

And I’m going to add one more:

4. If someone screws up, give them the opportunity to learn and then forgive them.

If four rules are too much for you to deal with, just go with #3.

Don’t be a Jerk Face.*

That covers just about everything.

* a descriptive term that only Kerri could think of